Onondaga War Memorial
Syracuse, New York
Vince and Mr. Perfect are just in time for Memorial Day. Perfect then makes some dad jokes about Warrior puking.
Undertaker vs. Bill Pierce
Pierce attacks Taker from behind and of course he no sells it. Taker was so much more intimidating looking during this era. Berzerker is going to kick Taker's stinkin' teeth in. Taker walks the ropes and then hits the Tombstone. I didn't see that coming.
Match Rating: 1/4* (out of 5)
Update is brought to you by the WWF catalog. I remember looking at the catalog over and over, but never buying anything. We get highlights of Papa Shango putting a curse on Ultimate Warrior from last week. Papa Shango then informs us that he owns Warrior.
Duane Gill vs. Virgil
Two of the most famous jobbers of the era. Vince lets us know that Virgil will be in attendance for the WBF Championship! Big buyrate coming up. Virgil's offense in this match is kind of heelish. Virgil puts on the Million Dollar Dream and it's over.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Money Inc. vs. Jim Powers & Mark Kay
Jim Powers looks as cheesy as ever. IRS screws up getting atomic dropped, as he seemed to not konw where to run after the move. I will never understand how IRS lasted as long as he did. Clothesline by IRS for the pinfall victory.
Match Rating: 1/4*
We are in the Event Center with High Energy. Koko says they are so high...a natural high. Sure, buddy. It's no wonder that promos are scripted. Rick Martel calls Tatanka "buffalo breath". Imagine watching cartoons instead of this on Saturday mornings in 1992.
British Bulldog vs. Barry Hardy
I think this sums up the match pretty well:
Match Rating: 1/4*
We then go to a video of Ric Flair, Mr. Perfect and some girl at a picnic. They play a voice message of Liz saying she's going to give Ric a homecoming when he comes home. Perfect says that Savage bought the cow, but Flair gets the milk for free.
Crush and his mullet are back for a promo and how he's going to try to be #1. After an awkward pause, he sends a message to all the bullies in the WWF. Who thought it was a good idea to ever let him talk? Blake Beverly sure gives a smiley heel promo. I am proud of them. They did not say Legion of Sissies once in there. Progress.
Bobby Knight vs. The Mountie
I wish it was the other Bobby Knight. Mounties elbow was always a nice move. Sgt. Slaughter naturally salutes all of those who risked their lives. I can't believe how big of a fan of the Mountie I have become while watching these old Superstars. He then brings the new shock stick to the ring and ties to shock poor Bobby, but he escapes after Tim White distracts him.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Crunch Classic is coming out on home video this week! Make sure to buy it.
Ultimate Warrior is out for an interview with Mean Gene. Warrior is rambling on about nothing as usual and then all of a sudden something starts oozing our of his head. The live audience has no idea what is going on.
Dublin Destroyer + Vince Sola vs. Bushwhackers
What a living the Bushwhackers made off of this gimmick. They do like 3 moves and that's it. Maybe it wouldn't have been the worst idea to have a squash match last more than 30 seconds every now and then?
Match Rating: 1/4*
Kamala vs. Kerry Davis
Kamala is a little bit more aggressive this week. The crowd reacts to this match as if they are at a funeral. Might as well throw him into a feud with Undertaker.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Vince McMahon then promotes WBF Magazine and how there is an article about steroids and that the WWF is against them. Got it, Vince.
Shawn Michaels is coming for the Hitman and his Intercontinental title. The Natural Disasters want to know how Jimmy Hart sleeps at night after what he did.
So we don't even get one feature matchup and a whole lot of the same old nothing this week. With no pay-per-view coming up, they are focused on their house show matches and that's fine, but the stories are being advanced at a snails pace. Another meh here.
Overall Rating: 28%
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