Monday, May 22nd, 2006
Thomas & Mack Center
Las Vegas, Nevada
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Vince McMahon starts off backstage to address Shane being attacked by a sledgehammer. Thankfully for his superior genetics, he has only suffered a mild concussion. He is demanding a public apology from Triple H.
Mick Foley is out and there is something hidden in the ring by a red covering. Foley is wearing a suit here and lets us know that he isn't a bad guy. He makes fun of Vegas a little and then brings out Edge and Lita. Foley presents the Hardcore Championship to Edge and said he's bringing it out of retirement for him. Edge says he can't accept it and that Foley still deserves it. Foley takes a subtle jab at Edge and says that the only way to decide it is for them to have a match here tonight. Edge says he has a better idea and has Lilian Garcia announce them as the co-Hardcore Champions. Out comes Paul Heyman, which leads to a woman holding a baby chanting "E-C-W". He calls Foley a prostitute for sacrificing his life for his career and then joins forces with Edge and Lita. He calls him a shell of his former self, so Foley reminds him that Heyman has nothing left and that he should crawl back in the hole in the ground that he came from. Heyman says he's right, but he does have the power to issue a challenge at One Night Stand. Edge tells him to round up any two bingo hall performers he can round up. He brings out Tommy Dreamer and Terry Funk and they start brawling on the ramp. Dreamer and Funk stand tall, but I keep being reminded that the crowd just wasn't super into this so far.
The Diva Search is back. Yep.
Intercontinental Championship Match
Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin
We get an early commercial break after RVD knocks Shelton out of the ring. During the commercial, Shelton dropped Van Dam face-first into the turnbuckle. RVD makes his comeback with a close call after a superkick. RVD hits Rolling Thunder and again Shelton is able to kick out. Shelton hits a Samoan Drop and RVD hits the referee's ankle on the way down. That actually looked legit since it was just his ankle, but considering Shelton immediately went out to grab the Intercontinental belt it obviously wasn't. RVD kicks the belt into the face of Shelton and he gets disqualified. Jim Ross says that they obviously had to, despite that like never happening. After the decision, RVD hits a Five Star Frog Splash and holds up the title. The match was fine for what it was.
Match Rating: **
Vince McMahon is back with ZZ Top and he leaves them with Candice Michelle. This was pointless.
Vince is now out to the ring for the public apology. He comes out. He apologizes. But Vince wants more. He wants him to end Shawn Michaels tonight.
Kane talks about his movie where he kills lots of people and tonight he will inflict insufferable pain on his opponent. It's so hard to pick which version of Kane sucked the most, but See No Evil Kane is near the top.
Chris Masters vs. John Cena
There was probably a point in time that they were hoping this would be a pay-per-view main event. Masters hits a a clothesline and actually draws some cheers from the crowd. When we come back from commercial breaks, Cena makes his comeback with some shoulder tackles. He knocks Masters down and puts him in the STFU and that's all. The commercial break made this match seem like it was two minutes long.
Match Rating: 3/4*
Out comes Rob Van Dam and he's here to talk about his Money In The Bank briefcase. He's going to make the most of this and he's not going to get screwed out of his chance, so he's going to use it June 11th at ECW One Night Stand. They go face-to-face and RVD slaps Cena. They start brawling and Cena hits a body slam. Masters tries to hit him from behind, but Cena takes care of him too. RVD hits the Van Daminator with the briefcase on Cena and heads to the back.
Carlito and Maria are backstage and they run into Snitsky, who is waiting for a Vegas showgirl. It turns out to be Goldust, but of course he doesn't notice until after he hits on him.
We transition to Triple H and his sledgehammer. Michaels confronts him and says that he always had respect for him, but he didn't like what he did out there.
Trevor Murdoch vs. Kane
Murdoch tries to get something going, but he instead gets a boot to the face. He hits a chokeslam and that's all. Did you know that See No Evil had the third highest per screen average? Wow! He hits another chokeslam after the match just because. He almost walks away, but then heads back and hits a third.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Then something pops up on the screen and I just don't even care enough to listen to it.
Torrie Wilson vs. Mickie James
Torrie gets a roll up for a nearfall and follows it up with a dropkick. Mickie destroys her and hits her variation of the DDT for the easy victory. More filler.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Out comes Trish Stratus and she says that Beth Phoenix is now officially on the Raw roster. Beth attacks Mickie from behind and they have a sloppy brawl that goes into the crowd.
Viscera is in the ring and says he has big news. He says it's time to settle down and brings Lillian Garcia in the ring. She stands up for herself and then he pulls a burger out of his robe. He gets on his knee and out comes Armando Alejandro Estrada. Umaga comes out and they start going at it. Umaga eventually hits the Samoan Spike and knocks him out. I thought they made Viscera look too strong here.
The Spirit Squad are backstage and they talk trash to Triple H to follow Vince's orders.
Handicap Match
Spirit Squad vs. Shawn Michaels
The Spirit Squad hit their throw the guy up in the air thingy right away and then take turns hitting moves on Michaels. They go to hit him with a chair, but Michaels gets his feet up and knocks most of them out of the ring and hits the others with the chair. He hits the top rope elbow drop and hits Sweet Chin Music on two members, but then gets hit with a chair by Nicky. Kenny hits the top rope leg drop to Pillman-ize Michaels. Out comes Triple H and of course he ends up saving him and we go off the air with a disappointed Vince. This wasn't really a match, but I guess I'll rate it just for the heck of it.
Match Rating: 3/4*
I thought this was a pretty terrible episode. The stuff that was good, which was the One Night Stand stuff, didn't get the reaction they were hoping for. There was lots of Kane and lots of Spirit Squad, which all sucked. Disappointing show overall.
Overall Rating: 43%
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