Monday, October 30th, 2006
The MARK Of The Quad Cities
Moline, Illinois
Follow me on Twitter: @WorkTheNetwork2
Edge and Randy Orton are in the ring to kick off the show. Edge is disgusted that he has to spend his birthday with these people. Orton says that his victory over Triple H last week should make him happy and we get highlights. They bring out Eric Bischoff, Jonathan Coachman and Vince McMahon to the ring. They all plead their case as to why they should be the referee at Cyber Sunday. It feels kind of beneath Mr. McMahon. Vince announces that Randy Orton will face Triple H for the third week in a row, this time with Edge as referee. Oh, and Shawn Michaels is not here due to a personal reason. Vince then asks everyone to leave except Coach. He's worried that Raw may no longer have a champion on their show. Coach suggests that Cena maybe have the night off, but Vince disagrees. He then offers Cena to face King Booker and Big Show in a handicap match, but that idea is also shot down. Coach then asks Vince what he would do. Vince says that he wants everyone watching the show to decide who he will wrestle tonight. He calls Booker the WCW Champion. Can you imagine if someone else said that? He offers King Booker, Big Show and Coach as the options. You just need to go to WWE.com or you can text on your phones. Vince is completely failing at this, by the way. The voting begins now.
Triple Threat Match
Johnny Nitro vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito
Jeff Hardy comes out after to scout the three possible opponents for him on Sunday. We get the three opponents trading moves, with the highlight being Shelton hitting a leaping bulldog on Carlito out of nowhere. Shelton goes up top, but Carlito slows him down. That allows Nitro to hit a dropkick on Shelton in midair. Carlito hits a Backstabber and that's all. Talk about making that match seem important.
Match Rating: *1/2
John Cena is backstage for an interview and he makes a dumb joke about Kevin Federline's album. He's not worried about tonight because it's up to the crowd. He then bugs Todd Grisham about who he voted for. He then says that Grisham likes dudes and it makes him so mad he confesses that he voted for King Booker and he hopes that he beats him tonight. Cena's interviews during this era are some of his worst stuff.
Torrie Wilson and Candice Michelle are laughing about voting for Coach tonight. Torrie goes over to Carlito to see how he's doing after Trish. They make plans to meet up after the show. You can give Carlito all the women you want, but no one cares.
Mickie James is out and they announce that you can vote on the type of match for the Women's Championship Tournament Finals.
WWE Women's Championship Tournament Semifinal Match
Lita vs. Maria
Lita talks trash to Mickie and that gives Maria the opportunity for a couple of quick pin attempts, neither of which are successful. Mickie tells us that she'd like a chance at a submission match to show the fans the holds she knows. Meanwhile, Maria hits a bulldog and then a bronco buster. Lita counters out of it and tries to win with her feet on the ropes, but the ref catches it. Lita hits a DDT and that's it. I'm not sure what the point of this was.
Match Rating: 1/4*
After the match, Lita and Mickie get in each other's faces.
Triple H vs. Randy Orton
Triple H is out first and he does the "Are you ready?" schtick. During the chant, he takes the microphone and blindsides him with it, knocking him out. When we come back from commercial, we have a regular referee and Orton makes his way out. Triple H being Triple H, he dominates Orton in the early going. I wonder how many times these two ended up wrestling each other? Triple H gets pushed into the ring post and Orton hits his variation of the neckbreaker. He follows that up with a DDT and a 2 count. Orton telegraphs the back body drop and gets hit with a knee. Out comes Edge and he attacks Triple H, causing the DQ finish. They get out a chair and Orton goes for a RKO. Triple H pushes him onto the chair, but gets hit with a Spear from Edge. Triple H grabs a sledgehammer from under the ring and he and Edge swing their weapons, but the sledgehammer wins. Triple H hits him in the midsection and Rated RKO retreats. This was just standard fare with Triple H always looking like the smarter wrestler.
Match Rating: *3/4
Handicap Match
Eugene & Jim Duggan vs. Umaga
Eugene is scared of Umaga. Meanwhile, his partner gets hit with a headbutt off the second rope. Umaga hits the Samoan Spike and that's all. Eugene is still over by the timekeeper area and shaking. I guess they had a couple of minutes to fill here.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Coach is getting ready backstage and is approached by Bischoff. Coach tells him he's going to show him the new Coach to the next person who walks through the door. Out walks Faarooq and you know what happens next.
Ric Flair is out to talk about his title match at Cyber Sunday and that the fans will determine who his partner is going to be. He brings out Sgt. Slaughter, Roddy Piper and Dusty Rhodes. They are 58, 52 and 61 respectively. They all cut a promo to kill some more time tonight.
Cryme Tyme is back with Todd Grisham and steel a flat screen TV.
Cryme Tyme vs. Charlie Haas & Viscera
They brought the TV down to ringside and hook it up to JR and Lawler's announce table. I'd call the action, but I'm sure no one looking at this would actually bother to read this. Viscera puts JTG in a bear hug and is just daring me to turn this off. Viscera misses with a splash in the corner and tags in Haas. JTG counters out of a possible atomic drop attempt and tags in Shad. Things break down and JTG is able to snap Haas on the top rope behind the referee's back. They hit G9 for the victory. This was pretty dull.
Match Rating: 1/2*
Triple H is backstage with Grisham to talk about how he doesn't care which referee gets voted in on Sunday.
Coach is trying to vote backstage and in walks King Booker and Sharmell. Big Show joins the party as well. They argue a little bit before agreeing that Coach should be the one to fight Cena tonight.
King Booker and Queen Sharmell are on their way to the ring. Big Show and Coach then make their way as well. They announce that Coach wins with 74% of the votes.
Jonathan Coachman vs. John Cena
I feel like we get a main event like this every 6-8 weeks on Raw. Cena chases Coach up the ramp and grabs him by the ear. He throws him back in the ring, but is then hit with a Spear from Big Show. He and Booker attack him and throw him into the steps. They throw him in the ring and Coach immediately tries a pin, getting a 2 count. While Booker and Big Show make loud noises as guest announcers, Cena dominates Coach. He hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle and the FU. He slaps on the STFU for the easy victory. What a fantastic main event.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Well, this episode existed. That's about as far as I can go with giving it any sort of praise. There was nothing on this one that was even slightly memorable and while they attempted to build to Cyber Sunday, there just isn't much interesting going on right now on Raw.
Overall Rating: 31%
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