Sunday, February 18th, 2007
Staples Center
Los Angeles, California
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MVP & MNM vs. Hardys & Chris Benoit
So we were supposed to get a rematch of the ladder match from Armageddon, but instead we are getting this and Paul London and Brian Kendrick will face Deuce 'N Domino. Benoit and MVP weren't feuding, but I guess this will be used as the beginning of their feud. The faces all dominate the beginning of the match until Mercury is able to pull Jeff and throw him into the barricade. Jeff does fight back by hitting a variation of Whisper In The Wind and tags in Matt. The heels are able to work well as a team here and quickly isolate Matt. Benoit comes in and hits a double German suplex to get a nice pop. The Hardys hit Poetry In Motion into a Matt Side Effect, Jeff Swanton and Benoit diving headbutt. They go for the pin on Mercury, but MVP breaks up the attempt. Hardy goes for a sunset flip powerbomb to the outside, but Nitro holds onto the ropes and hits him with a clothesline. Benoit is able to get MVP in the Crossface, but Nitro breaks that up. We get some more chaos and MNM goes for the Snapshot on Benoit, but Matt stops them. Benoit puts the Crossface on Mercury and he immediately taps. That was a nice little match to open the show, which is about the only reason it existed.
Match Rating: ***1/4
Kristal is backstage with Vickie Guerrero, who thanks her for her help.
Hornswoggle can talk now and he says that he doesn't want to go out to the ring because he's afraid of the mini Boogeyman. He throws him into a garbage can and then out comes mini Boogeyman. This is the point of the show where I realized that I skipped over SmackDown in my reviews, haha.
Cruiserweight Open For The Cruiserweight Championship
Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Daivari vs. Gregory Helms vs. Funaki vs. Shannon Moore vs. Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Jamie Noble vs. Chavo Guerrero
This is like the Royal Rumble, where they drew numbers for how they entered. Daivari and Scotty are first and the crowd doesn't even react for Scotty. Scotty hits the Worm and that's it? You have to love how there is just absolutely no logic in these matches. Gregory Helms is next and it feels pretty obvious that he's going to lose it here now. Scotty is going to sign for the Worm, but Helms snaps his neck on the rope. He then hits a variation of the Codebreaker and moves onto the next opponent. It's Funaki and he quickly goes for a crossbody off the top rope, but Helms rolls through and grabs the tights and he is gone. Moore hits a Blockbuster neckbreaker off the second rope and gets a 2 count. Helms comes back and hits that Codebreaker type move and Moore is gone. Out comes Jimmy Wang Yang and he quickly hits a standing moonsault for a 2. Yang misses with a moonsault and lands on his feet, but then is clubbed by Helms. Yang comes back with a hurricanrana and hooks the legs for the pin. We are now guaranteed a new champion as Jamie Noble makes his way down. I like Helms, but his title reign was uninspired. They have never cared about the Cruiserweight division and this run was no different. They battle for a little bit until Yang hits the moonsault for the win. They are about to announce Yang as the new champion, but then Chavo Guerrero's music hits. So anyone could just join after the numbers were drawn and guarantee themselves the last entry? I wish I cared about any of this, but I just don't. Chavo hits the Frog Splash and is your new champ. The crowd barely reacted to any of this.
Match Rating: 3/4*
Kristal is with John Cena and he's in a jokey mood tonight. He just says that tonight he will fight as hard with Shawn Michaels as he will against Shawn Michaels at WrestleMania.
Finlay & Hornswoggle vs. Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman
How did the card for this show get approved? Finlay and Boogeyman battle a little bit and it leads to Little Boogeyman being in the ring. Hornswoggle comes out from hiding and rolls up his sleeve. Instead, Finlay knocks him down instead. Hornswoggle goes back into hiding and Little Boogeyman uses a small package to get a 2 count on Finlay. Finlay beats on him for a little bit and then throws him out of the ring. Hornswoggle grabs him and rolls him under the ring. Finlay goes to check and the regular Boogeyman is there. Boogeyman makes a comeback and hits a catapult. He then launces Little Boogeyman on top of Finlay, but Hornswoggle breaks up the pin attempt. Boogeyman pulls out some worms and he bolts through the crowd. Finlay hits Little Boogeyman with the shillelagh and picks up the win. This was death.
Match Rating: 1/4*
Shawn Michaels is now with Kristal and says that the only man he trusts is Triple H, but he gave his word that absolutely nothing will happen to Cena before WrestleMania.
King Booker vs. Kane
You know what will make a show worse? Kane. This just has first hour of SmackDown written all over it. Kane hits a boot to the face and then clotheslines Booker over the top rope. Booker comes back and hits a missile dropkick. Michael Cole is losing his voice on this show and it just adds to the awfulness. Kane goes off the top rope, but Booker is able to catch him with a kick on the way down. Booker tries to suplex Kane, but Kane counters and hits one of his own. Kane hits a side suplex and hits the top rope clothesline. Sharmell distracts Kane and it allows Booker to hit a kick. Kane still comes back and hits a chokeslam and that is enough for the victory? Yet another stupid match. Kane was as impressive here as he has been as a mayor. Kane should have been on the poster for this show so that we could be warned that it would be this awful.
Match Rating: 3/4*
Kristal is now with Batista and he says that SmackDown is going to beat up on Raw. She tries to pretend she is good at interviewing, but instead it's about as convincing as an elementary school play.
WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Paul London & Brian Kendrick vs. Deuce 'n Domino
While I personally love the challengers, it's clear they were not over with the live audience. The champs outsmart them early on and clear the ring. We get a blown spot where Deuce doesn't get into the ring quickly enough and London runs into him. Domino has a bloody lip also in the early going. The challengers come back and slow the pace way down and probably too early for this match. They hit a big double back body drop and go right back to the ground. London avoids a kick and then makes the hot tag to Kendrick. He hits a big dropkick but then runs into a big clothesline. Kendrick is going up top but Domino gets there. Deuce puts him up on his shoulders for a Doomsday Device, but Kendrick ducks it and rolls him up to steal the victory. This was a very disappointing match, as they had done much better work together on SmackDown and this felt like a pointless match.
Match Rating: 3/4*
Mr. Kennedy is interviewed and says that his thoughts on Bobby Lashley are the same as his opinion on the people of LA, phony. He's about to declare himself the new champion until Lashley interrupts him. Kennedy tries to hit him with a right hand, but it gets blocked and Lashley hits him with one of his own. This was kind of a weird segment.
ECW Championship Match
Bobby Lashley vs. Mr. Kennedy
Lashley is announced first and is attacked from behind. The whole thing falls kind of flat and they just eventually get to the ring and the match starts. JBL wisely brings up the fact that if Kennedy wins the title here, would he be forced to leave? I don't think anyone thinks he would win because this was such an afterthought of a match. The crowd is pretty dead for this as well, which is kind of surprising since Lashley's fan reaction has been improving and Kennedy has been booked pretty strong. Kennedy is working on the leg for what feels like forever here. The crowd is dead and JBL is doing everything in his power to put this over, but this one is just not working. Kennedy goes for the Kenton, but Lashley gets his knees up. Lashley goes for the powerslam, but Kennedy takes out his knee. He goes outside and grabs a chair while the ref's back is turned. Somehow he doesn't hear Kennedy hit him with it even though he is 3 feet away from it. Lashley gets the chair and hits Kennedy with it and is disqualified. What a stupid match. Lashley then attacks him repeatedly with the chair until IRS and other officials stop him. What an absolute waste of time.
Match Rating: 1/2*
The Miz is out to start the Diva Talent Invitational. Up first is ECW's Extreme Exposé and they do seemingly the same dance they always do. You know the one where Layla dances to the beat and the other two don't. How is there 43 minutes left in this show? Jillian is up next and she starts her singing gimmick. She says she wrote her own song and then she needs to warm up first before doing the whole schtick. Miz calls her the female William Hun g and then she snaps back. The other ladies come out to confront her and they all start brawling. Out comes Ashley to pyro and her cover being hung in front of the address. She takes off her top and is wearing nothing on top other than bunnies. Miz then declares her the winner of the contest. If you thought this show couldn't get any worse, you were wrong.
We get a lengthy recap of everything that has led up to the main event because they realize they have a ton of time to kill still.
John Cena & Shawn Michaels vs. Batista & Undertaker
I mean I guess the main appeal of this match was that all of the matchups within the matchup were fresh here. They build up the early part of the match to a hot tag to Cena, which of course receives a mixed reaction from the live crowd. Cena hits a top rope leg drop to a standing Batista, but Taker is able to break up the pin attempt. Cena hits a 5 Knuckle Shuffle to wake up the crowd. He gets Batista up for the FU, but eats a big boot from Taker. Michaels dumps Taker out of the ring. He tries leaping off the apron, but Taker catches him and gets driven into the ring post. Batista gets Cena up for a Batista Bomb, but Michaels takes out his knee. We're getting some good action here, especially after all of the garbage we've been forced to watch prior to this. Cena even plays heel for a second, taking a cheap shot on a wounded Batista behind the referee's back. Batista is bleeding now and Cena puts on the STFU. After a lengthy time in the hold, Taker just decides to come in and hit a boot to the head. Michaels goes for Sweet Chin Music, but Batista ducks and hits a spinning Rock Bottom. Both men make tags and Taker gets the better of it. He hits Snake Eyes on Michaels and a diving shoulder tackle on Cena. Batista hits a spinebuster on Michaels and Taker hits a chokeslam on Cena. Batista then hits a spinebuster on Undertaker. Michaels then hits Sweet Chin Music and Cena hits the FU for the victory as Batista stands and watches. Batista then grabs his title and holds it over a knocked out Undertaker before heading to the back. Taker sits up and gives Batista the look. This was a very entertaining match, but it would have taken an all time classic to save this dumpster fire of a show.
Match Rating: ***3/4
This was such a bad, bad show. The card was poor, the match layout was uninspired and there was no purpose to just about everything on the show. This was just filler.
Overall Rating: 26%
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