Off The Grid, Volume 20: WrestleMania III Review

Sunday, March 29th, 1987
Pontiac Silverdome
Pontiac, Michigan

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Off The Grid, Volume 20:

Vince McMahon is in the ring and welcomes us to WrestleMania III. He then introduces Aretha Franklin to sing "America The Beautiful". This really is a fantastic performance by Aretha. We then go to Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura, Mary Hart and Bob Uecker. 

Can-Am Connection vs. Don Muraco & Bob Orton

The Can-Am Connection starts off hot and hits a double monkey flip on Muraco. In comes Orton and he gets hit with a body slam by Rick Martel. I will say, seeing the Silverdome will always bring back such great memories for me. I was too young at the time to even know what WrestleMania was. I got into wrestling about 3 1/2 years later at SummerSlam 1990. All four men end up in the ring and it leads to Muraco accidentally hitting a back body drop on Orton and Martel hits a high cross body on Muraco and gets the victory. This was very okay. I hate the way that they announce the winners during this era. It just all feels so unimportant. 

Match Rating: **

We get a Hercules/Billy Jack Haynes highlight package and Hercules tells us that we'll find out who the master of the Full Nelson is. 

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules

I'm pretty sure this is the only match of Haynes's that I've ever seen. I do have to say that he is a good sized dude. Did Hercules ever win a meaningful match? Why is this one of the longest matches on the card? I have more questions than I have things to say about the actual match. After some sluggish offense, Hercules tries to lock in the Full Nelson. He can't get the fingers locked, but Haynes is still fading. Haynes fights back up to his feet and breaks the hold. They hit a double clothesline and are both down for the count. Haynes is able to slap on the Full Nelson, but they both fall out of the ring. Haynes puts is on again outside the ring and they both get counted out. That's a WrestleMania finish if I ever saw one. This match was about as dull as it gets. Hercules grabs the chains and hits Haynes in the back. He continues the attack and Haynes is bleeding. He puts on the Full Nelson and throws him to the mat. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

Mean Gene is with King Kong Bundy and he's going to squash his opponents. We then go to Mean Gene and Hillbilly Jim, who is worried about his buddies. 

King Kong Bundy, Little Tokyo & Lord Littlebrook vs. Hillbilly Jim, Little Beaver & Haiti Kid

I really hate the fake music they use for Hillbilly Jim. It is pretty amazing that Bundy went from the main event to pretty much standing on the apron as a spectator for this match. He does eventually get tagged in, but Beaver hits a dropkick on him and then tags in Hillbilly. Hillbilly hits a clothesline and all three of them jump on him, but Bundy still kicks out. I'm pretty sure Braun Strowman would be treated like Braun Strowman in modern day times. We get some more cheating from the babyface side to try and slow down Bundy. Bundy body slams Beaver behind the referee's back, but he sees the elbow drop and that's a disqualification. He tries to splash him, but the little people all get in the way of it. This was too short to be anything and they really didn't even sell the Bundy moment as much as they should have. Meanwhile, one of the producers is telling the guys to hurry up. 

Match Rating: 3/4*

Mary Hart is with Miss Elizabeth, but before she can get a word in, she is interrupted by Randy Savage. Hart does a nice job here. 

We see some highlights of the Harley Race/Junkyard Dog feud. Mean Gene is with Harley, Fabulous Moolah and Bobby Heenan. Heenan gives the crown to Moolah and tells her to give it to him after the match.

Junkyard Dog is now with Mean Gene and says that Race has been sitting on the throne for too long.

Loser Must Bow Match
Harley Race vs. Junkyard Dog

Both guys were nowhere near their prime for this match. Race goes for a headbutt off the apron, but JYD moves and he goes splat. JYD clotheslines him back into the ring and then sends him right back out. Gorilla critiques JYD's abdominal stretch and Race is able to get out. Race yet again gets sent out of the ring. We now get the dog headbutts, but Bobby Heenan distracts JYD. Race hits a belly-to-belly suplex and gets the victory. There's no way you can tell me that was even a good finish in 1987. The actual match was slightly better than I remembered until the abrupt finish. Race gets in the chair and robe and JYD curtsies. JYD then grabs the chair and hits Race in the back. JYD then leaves in the mini ring cart with the robe on. 

Match Rating: *

Vince is with Hulk Hogan. He talks something about Harley's and mountains or something. 

The Dream Team says nothing in their interview. 

Rougeau Brothers vs. Dream Team

Seeing the Rougeaus as babyfaces is just weird to me. They hit a double dropkick on Beefcake and he tags in Valentine. It should be noted that historical favorite, Dino Bravo, is on the outside with Johnny Valiant. Jacques misses with a crossbody and Valentine capitalizes on it. They hit a fairly innovative move with Beefcake holding Raymond in a press slam and Valentine hitting him off the top rope before Beefcake hits a backbreaker. In walks Heenan to brag about being 2-0 so far tonight even though Hercules didn't win. Then Gorilla calls him out for the Bundy match, but Heenan says it doesn't count because he wasn't out there. The Rougeaus hit their finisher, but Beefcake comes in and brawls with Jacques. The ref is distracted and Dino hits Raymond and they pick up the cheap victory. Valentine, Dino and Valiant leave Beefcake behind, which is the only reason this match existed. This was another short match with an unsatisfying finish. 

Match Rating: *1/2

They show highlights of the Roddy Piper/Adrian Adonis feud, which involves a lot of Jimmy Hart getting beat up. 

They show Adrian Adonis and Jimmy Hart with Mean Gene. Adonis gives an enjoyable hyperactive promo. These are all way too short to give them any chance to really say anything, but this was probably the best one so far. 

Hair Match
Adrian Adonis vs. Roddy Piper

Piper of course announced his retirement before this match. It was a real disservice that he would never, ever wrestle again. Piper has a belt and he uses it right away, which of course the ref allows allows. Adonis is able to get the belt and starts whipping Piper. Gorilla wants the belt taken away because Piper didn't use it as long. Piper fights back and gives them a double noggin knocker and then throws Hart into Adonis, sending them over the top rope. He then throws Hart off the top rope and onto Adonis. Hart is doing a fantastic job here getting tossed around. Hart trips up Piper and slows him down. Adonis goes to work and slams him into the timekeeper table. Hart also gets in a cheap shot. Hart sprays more of the perfume in Piper's face and Adonis puts on the sleeper hold. Piper tries driving Adonis into the turnbuckles, but Adonis still keeps the hold on. Adonis thinks he's won the match, but the ref says no. Out comes Brutus Beefcake and wakes up Piper. Piper slaps on his sleeper and the crowd goes nuts. Adonis is out and this one is over. Beefcake starts buzzing Adonis's head while Piper messes around with Hart. After the haircut, Piper holds up a mirror and Adonis punches it and snaps. He leaves the ring with Hart's jacket over his head. This was a master class in how to be a small heel manager in a big match. They had a hot crowd and did a lot with the short amount of time they were given. This is the first true highlight of the show. 

Match Rating: ***

Gorilla, Mary and Bob are talking about Ventura being missing. He is introduced to the live crowd to stroke his ego. He shakes hands with Jimmy Hart, Danny Davis and the Hart Foundation. Tough draw for Jimmy Hart having to go back to back here. 

They show an interview with the heel team and I will never be used to Bret in those sunglasses. 

Hart Foundation & Danny Davis vs. British Bulldogs & Tito Santana

Tito immediately attacks the heels outside the ring. Ventura for some reason rides away in the mini ring with Matilda. This match feels so rushed and it's kind of ruining the flow of it. The Hart Foundation do most of the heavy lifting and then tag in Davis. He tags himself right back out and it's back to the Foundation. They slingshot Davis in the ring, but Dynamite Kid gets his knees up and in comes Tito. Tito is super over here, as he should be. He goes for the Figure Four, but Neidhart runs in and clubs him. In comes Davey Boy and he hits a clothesline. He hits a Tombstone piledriver and then the vertical suplex. Davey hits the running powerslam, but Neidhart again breaks it up. It's all chaos and Davis hits Davey with the megaphone and gets the cheap victory. This was disappointing, but still pretty good. It's just a shame because they could have had a classic here. 

Match Rating: **3/4

Mean Gene is with Andre The Giant and Bobby Heenan. Heenan is saying that Hulkamania is dead and Heenan will be managing the champion of the world. 

Butch Reed vs. Koko B Ware

I never quite got why Koko was always such a jobber to the stars, as he was pretty much always over. Reed is a little bit more sluggish than I remember. Koko makes a comeback and hits a dropkick for a 2 count. Koko rolls him up with a small package for another 2. Koko hits a crossbody, but Reed rolls it over and steals the victory. This was such a nothing match. After the match, Slick hits Koko with the cane. Out comes Tito Santana and he rips the clothes off of Slick, before he runs to the back. Koko and Tito hit Reed with a double dropkick. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

We get quick thoughts from both Savage and Steamboat, including a more cartoony interview than normal from Steamboat. 

Intercontinental Championship Match
Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat

George Steele is in Steamboat's corner just to remind us of what a waste of Savage's time the feud with him was. Savage is able to throw Steamboat over the rope and to the floor. Steamboat battles back and Savage ends up stuck in the ropes. They go on a frenzy and it ends with Savage hitting a knee to the back. Savage tries to throw Steamboat over the top rope, but Steamboat skins the cat. Savage greets him with a clothesline and this time he's to the floor. Savage hits a running knee to the back that sends Steamboat over the timekeeper table and over the guardrail. Steele picks up Steamboat and throws him back into the ring. Savage just takes him and throws him over the top again. This time Savage hits a double ax handle from the top rope. Back in the ring he hits another double ax handle from the top and gets a 2 count. Savage snaps the injured throat on the top rope. After a series of moves and unsuccessful pin attempts, Steamboat is able to back body drop Savage over the top rope. Steamboat hits a top rope chop, but Savage gets his foot on the rope. Steamboat tries a bunch of different pin attempts and then hits a slingshot into the ring post. Savage accidentally throws Steamboat into the ref and he is down. Savage hits the top rope elbow drop, but the ref is not there. Savage goes for the bell and tries to go off the top rope. Steele shoves him off before he can use it. Steamboat is able to get a small package and we have a new Intercontinental Championship. What else needs to be said about this match? It set the bar for years to come and in many ways was the first great match of the Hogan era of WWF. This was what storytelling could do for a match, especially when you have two guys who can play their roles like Savage and Steamboat can. Plus, I think Steamboat was the first guy who could keep up with Savage's mind and as a result, we got perfection. 

Match Rating: *****

Jake Roberts and Alice Cooper are with Mean Gene. It's amazing how little charisma Alice Cooper has. 

Honky Tonk Man and Jimmy Hart are up next. Honky Tonk says he's going to sing and dance for everyone. 

Jake Roberts vs. Honky Tonk Man

Jake tosses him into the ring and we're underway. Jake hits him with a knee and Honky rolls outside and tries to get out of his gear. Jake gives him a hand and body slams him outside the ring. Jake charges at Honky in the corner, but Honky gets his knee up. The momentum doesn't last long, as Jake hits the short arm clothesline. The action goes outside again and Jake gets thrown into the ring post. Honky hits the second rope fist and teases his finisher, but opts for more right hands instead. He goes for it, but Jake is able to counter it. Jake hits an inverted atomic drop and Honky is begging for mercy. Jake goes for the DDT, but Jimmy Hart grabs his foot. Honky rolls him up and he grabs the rope to steal the victory. Jake tries to hit Honky with the guitar, but he ducks and it explodes on the ring post. Honky escapes to the back, but Hart is still in the ring. Alice Cooper steps in, but Roberts comes from behind and puts him in a full nelson. Cooper grabs Damien and drapes him on Hart. They hightail it out of there and get pelted by cups on their way out. This one should have probably been earlier on the card because it was one of the bigger mid-card matches and it had the impossible task of following Savage/Steamboat. The crowd was kind of quiet for a lot of it. 

Match Rating: *3/4

Mean Gene is out to let us know that we have a new world indoor attendance record. 

Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff vs. Killer Bees

Volkoff tries to sing, but Jim Duggan runs out and attacks him. He grabs the mic and says that Volkoff can't sing that anthem because this is the land of the free and the home of the brave.  Out come the Killer Bees as the heels still get pelted with trash. The crowd is pretty dead for this one, even for Jim Brunzell's beautiful dropkick. Duggan gets the cheap "USA" chant going to wake them up a little bit. This match is way too long for what it is. Duggan starts chasing Volkoff around the ring. Iron Sheik has the Camel Clutch in and the chase comes in the ring. Duggan stops and hits Sheik in the back with the 2x4 and costs the Bees the match. What a stupid finish to a stupid match. Duggan gets on the mic and we get more "USA" chants and I have no idea why the Bees aren't furious. Ventura says the same thing as I typed that. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

Mean Gene is with Andre The Giant and Bobby Heenan. Heenan sure is excited, but these short interviews aren't great. 

Hulk Hogan is back again and he gives another acid trip of an interview. Ultimate Warrior's promos really weren't that much more insane than this.

They bring out the celebrities and now it's time for the main event.

WWF Championship Match
Andre The Giant vs. Hulk Hogan

They go face to face and Hogan quickly tries to go for the slam. He gives out and Andre thinks he won the match, but the ref says 2. Andre hits a big body slam and already looks like he's done for the night. Andre hits a second body slam and then steps on the back of Hogan. Andre slaps on the bear hug to try and put me to sleep. Hogan starts fading away, but you'll never guess what happens next. Okay, you guessed it. He breaks the hold and runs into him with some shoulders, but Andre hits a chop to the throat of Hogan. Andre hits a boot that arguably looks like it could have been below the belt, but that was as high as he could get his leg. Hogan ducks and Andre's head hits the ring post. Hogan rolls up the pads outside the ring and goes for a piledriver. Andre counters and hits a back body drop to the exposed wood. Andre misses a boot and Hogan knocks him down with a clothesline. Hogan goes for the body slam and this time he does it. He hits the leg drop and Hogan retains to a huge pop. I have to say, this was slightly better than I had remembered. If you took away the bear hug, it was passable. I don't rate my matches based on historical significance or any other factor other than how much I enjoyed it. I have disliked Hogan since the first day I ever watched wrestling and would have had no interest in this match if I had been watching in 1987. So I understand that it was the biggest match ever, but in my little bubble, it was just something I wasn't super interested in. With that being said, Hogan was WrestleMania at this point and the crowd loved this. It was mildly entertaining, but Hogan would do this same formula with more agile opponents after this. 

Match Rating: *1/2

This is a really hard one for me to rate. I just don't like this era of WWF as much as I do the early 90s. I don't like as much of the roster and so many of the matches here are filler. On the plus side, you have one of the greatest matches ever in Steamboat/Savage and I did enjoy the Piper/Adonis match as well. A lot of the rest was mildly entertaining and there is no doubt that this deserves a thumbs up, just not as overwhelmingly as a lot of people would say. 

Overall Rating: 79%

Monday Night Raw 8-1-94 Review

Monday, August 1st, 1994
Beeghly Center
Youngstown, Ohio

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We get a hype video for what is legitimately a huge match for Raw in 1994. Oh, remember Vince McMahon? He's back. 

Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

With the passing of Scott Hall just this past week, this is going to be a tough one to watch. This match has been on my list of ones I've wanted to see for a long time. Early on Razor sends Michaels over the top rope and has the crowd fired up. Michaels gets caught off the top rope with a fist to the midsection, but Michaels retaliates with a reverse neckbreaker. Razor hits the fall away slam and gets a 2 count. Michaels comes back with a dropkick and he gets a nearfall. After the commercial break, they show Razor slingshot Michaels over the top rope and onto Diesel in a fun spot. Michaels climbs up top and Razor tosses him to the mat. Razor slaps on the abdominal stretch, but Michaels hits him with a poke to the eye. This whole era of Michaels is still so confusing to me, as he was clearly one of the best in any wrestling organization at this time. Razor is out of the ring and Diesel is able to get in a cheap shot before our second commercial break. Michaels hits a double ax handle with Razor draped on the apron. Michaels slaps on the sleeper hold and Razor is fading. He miraculously gets the arm up on the third drop and hits a back suplex. While running the ropes, they collide in the center of the ring and both are down. Razor hits a clothesline and goes for his second rope suplex. Michaels elbows him off and hits a reverse crossbody, but Razor rolls for a 2. Razor goes for the Razor's Edge, but Diesel gets on the apron. Razor fights him off, but Michaels grabs the Intercontinental title. He misses wildly, but Razor runs into a big boot of Diesel and that's enough for the pinfall victory. After the match, they attack Razor until the referees come out. That was a pay-per-view quality match, which is a rarity for 1994 TV. 

Match Rating: ***1/2

Todd Pettengill is here for the SummerSlam Report and we are only 4 weeks away. I will still never understand their logic on doing SummerSlam on a Monday. 

Bull Nakano vs. Alundra Blayze

Bull gets the Orient Express entrance music here. This is a non-title match and Nakano immediately runs her into the ropes. Luna is in Bull's corner and she's watching Bull throw Alundra around the ring. Every time Alundra tries to get something going, Bull cuts her off. She hits a piledriver on her and pulls her head up before the count of 3. She hits a powerbomb, but Alundra kicks out. She goes for it again, but Alundra hits a sunset flip for a 2 count. Bull goes to the top rope, but misses with a leg drop. Alundra goes for the German suplex into a bridge, but Bull kicks out. Alundra goes up to the second rope, but Bull throws her off. Bull goes up and Alundra knocks her to the floor. Alundra hits a top rope dive to the floor. They start brawling and we have ourselves a double countout. After the match, Luna attacks Alundra. Alundra is able to throw her into Bull and knocks them both to the floor. The match was a little off at first, but picked up towards the end before the abrupt ending. 

Match Rating: **

Next week, Bam Bam Bigelow and IRS will take on Doink and Tatanka. 

Jerry Lawler is out and goes out to the crowd. We get a proposal and then Lawler brings her into the ring and embarrasses her and then kisses her. This is just...weird. Now Bob Backlund is out and continues his heel turn. Vince keeps talking over him for some reason and they show the highlights from Superstars. They then leave the interview in the middle of it for a commercial break. 

Smoking Gunns vs. George Anderson & Tom Bennett

When we come back, the Gunns are in the ring. They're working superspeed since there is a little over a minute left in the show. They hit a double side Russian leg sweep and we get another commercial break. What are they even doing here tonight? They hit their finisher and that is all just in time for them to go off the air. Did they really need to get this match in tonight? 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Just one week after we got Tatanka/Nikolai Volkoff and Yokozuna/Adam Bomb, they gave us one of the stronger double main events in Raw history up to this point. Razor and Shawn had a very good match and the women finally got a chance to have a match with some time. The only complaint was the timing issues at the end. They spent more time on the proposal than they did for the Backlund angle. 

Overall Rating: 70%

Superstars 7-30-94 Review

Original Airdate: Saturday, July 30th, 1994
Ocean City Convention Center
Ocean City, Maryland

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Hey, I think something actually happens on this episode. 

Diesel vs. Dave Thornberg

Diesel comes out aggressively and then hits a side suplex. He comes back with a big splash on the ropes and a big boot to the face. He stands on Thornberg and the ref counts even though he keeps lifting up his shoulders. I'm not sure why he didn't do the Jackknife there. Michaels jumps off the chest of Thornberg to give Diesel a high five. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

We get an Undertaker/Undertaker hype video.

WWF Championship Match
Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

They go face to face and share a few words as we go into a commercial break. Backlund is a little more aggressive than normal, although I feel like we haven't seen him in forever. Bret now goes to the mat and works on the arm and shoulder of Backlund. Backlund is able to hit a piledriver and both men are down. We get another commercial break and when was the last time there was a two commercial break match on Superstars? Both guys look like they're in the final minutes of a 60 minute draw here. Backlund bridges out of some pin attempts, which is pretty impressive, even if he isn't as old as they treat him. Bret trips over Backlund as he's running the ropes and he falls out of the ring. Backlund throws him back in and gets a 2 count. Backlund goes for the inside cradle and gets a 2 count. Bret does one of his own and gets the victory. Backlund is like the one guy Bret couldn't have a great match with. After the match, they shake hands, but then we get the beginning of the best thing in Backlund's career. Bret goes to shake his hand again, but Backlund slaps him and puts him in the Crossface Chicken Wing. This seems like such weird timing for all of this to go down, but it at least made Backlund interesting. The match was decent, but Backlund is just really boring. Everything after was gold. 

Match Rating: **1/4

It's time for a SummerSlam report and we hear from Owen Hart and Jim Neidhart. Owen talks about beating him up in the dungeon. They officially announce Tatanka vs. Lex Luger. 

Adam Bomb vs. Joey Sollins

Somehow the Kwang feud is still going on, which would totally have been the pre-show match in the Free For All era. Lots of people walking around either to or from their seats during this one. Bomb hits a dropkick and pump handle slam for the victory. This guest announcer kid is 1994 WWF fan in a nutshell. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

1-2-3 Kid is demanding a rematch against Jeff Jarrett and we're getting it here on Superstars. No complaints there. 

Fake Undertaker vs. Brian Hardy

My time is drawing nearer for this crap main event to try its best to ruin an otherwise fun show. Anyways, the Faker hits a leaping clothesline and the Tombstone for the victory. Make it stop. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Every house show they are picking fans to be guest managers, ring announcer and you may even get to hold the flag for Lex Luger! 

Now it's time for Leslie Nielsen and Dominos. Don't worry, it's to be continued. Next week Lex Luger is in the Heartbreak Hotel. 

Well, nothing ever really happens on this show and something major happened. Not only was the WWF title defended, but it set up a future pay-per-view and a new spin on a very stale character. The rest of the show was 1994 filler, but at least 25% of the show was based around Backlund and Bret. 

Overall Rating: 52%

Saturday Night's Main Event XXXIII Review

Saturday, July 15th, 2006
American Airlines Center
Dallas, Texas

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Hulk Hogan is out with Brooke to kick off the show. Brooke thanks everyone and hopes her career will be as successful as her dad's. I may be going out on a limb, but I don't think that's going to happen. Randy Orton is here to interrupt and comes out with a rose. This may be the most I have liked Randy Orton. Orton challenges Hulk to a match at SummerSlam and Hogan accepts. They shake hands and Orton walks off, while Brooke looks smitten. 

King Booker, Finlay & Mark Henry vs. Bobby Lashley, Batista & Rey Mysterio

That was a long amount of time just for entrances here despite having a pretty big card. Annnnnd, we have a commercial right into the beginning of the match. Not to mention there was a commercial during Booker's entrance. When we come back, Finlay is working on Mysterio. Mysterio hits a springboard moonsault, but Finlay's partners make the save. Out comes Hornswoggle and he hits Mysterio in the ribs with the shillelagh behind the referee's back. Mysterio dropkicks Henry's knees and makes the tag, but the ref doesn't see it and Booker drags him back to his corner. Mysterio is able to escape and tags in Batista. Batista hits a spinebuster on Booker and then after a weird pause, Mysterio hits a 619 on him. Batista hits the Batista Bomb and that is all. I'm not sure I get why Booker would take the loss there ahead of his title shot. Plus, that ending was just really weird. Lashley didn't factor into it and just stood there and watched and Henry was just MIA. The rest was pretty paint by numbers. 

Match Rating: **

Vince is pumping up the Spirit Squad. DX interrupts and overdubs what Vince and the Squad are saying. 

They show highlights of a Divas bull riding contest. Apparently the two finalists are Victoria and Michelle McCool and we'll be stuck watching that later on. 

Johnny Nitro & Melina vs. Carlito & Trish Stratus

The ladies start off the match and Nitro trips up Trish. Melina hits a sloppy looking move and both women are down. They tag in their partners and Carlito hits a dropkick. The ladies start brawling and they go outside. This distracts Carlito, but he reverses Nitro's move, hits a Backstabber and that is all. Why even put this on TV? This made no one look good. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

They show Kevin Von Erich being introduced to the crowd earlier in the night. 

Handicap Elimination Tag Team Match
Shawn Michaels & Triple H vs. Spirit Squad

Vince added the stipulation that any member that is eliminated has to go into tiny holding cells next to the ring. Michaels gets a hold of the megaphone and hits all of the crew with it. The Squad huddles on the outside and Triple H grabs a horn and plays it in their ears. Shawn hits Sweet Chin Music on Mitch and he's eliminated into the commercial break. Triple H hits a spinebuster on Johnny and he's gone. I think you can see where this is going. Kenny starts heading to the back, but Shawn chases after him and fights him on the stage. Out comes Vince and hits Shawn in the back with a chair. Their advantage doesn't last long and before you know it, Triple H is cleaning house. Triple H hits a Pedigree on Mitch and it's 2-on-2. I lookk down for a second and Mikey's now eliminated. Shawn hits an elbow from the top and then we get a Sweet Chin Music/Pedigree combo and that is all. Please let this be the end of these guys fighting. After the match, Vince hits the referee and gets the key to open the cage. Shawn hits Sweet Chin Music on Vince and they lock him in the cage with them. This was pretty terrible. Have they ever used those cages again? I'm drawing a blank. 

Match Rating: 3/4*

Great Khali and Daivari are in the ring. Big Show and Paul Heyman come out and interrupt. This all leads to Undertaker coming out. Undertaker starts attacking Khali and has to use all of his strength to clothesline him over the top rope. Big Show attacks him from behind and they start brawling. Undertaker has both by the neck, but then they both grab him by the neck and hit a double chokeslam on him. 

They talk to Big Show backstage and says that if you want to see the extreme giant, you tune in to Tuesday nights. He challenges Undertaker to a title match this Tuesday. 

Extreme Rules Match
Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

Sabu chucks a chair in the face of Richards and hits Air Sabu. He hits the triple jump moonsault and Richards kicks out at 2. Out comes the table and he brings it into the ring. Sabu tries to drag Richards on the table and one leg collapses. He improvises and hits a dive through the table with the chair for the victory. This was a little bit surprising considering he just got in trouble. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

Randy is shown talking to Brooke until Hulk shows up and tells him he'll see him at SummerSlam. Orton come running out of nowhere and he hits a RKO on the car. Brooke checks on him and Orton walks off. 

It's time for the bull riding contest. McCool is first and she lasts 12 seconds. Out comes Victoria in an outfit I'm sure she regrets. She lasts 7 seconds and throws a fit. McCool wins it and I have no idea why this was on TV. 

WWE Championship Match
John Cena vs. Edge

Edge tries to walk away but Cena grabs attacks him. Edge ducks a charging Cena and he falls out to the floor into the commercial break. Edge goes for a superplex, but Edge slips and somehow Cena still flips over, but Edge fell pretty hard there. Cena makes his comeback and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena hits the FU, but Lita pulls the referee out of the ring during the count. They then do the false finish with Edge tapping out of the STFU, but the ref disqualifies Edge and Cena is heartbroken. Edge hits a Spear. As Edge is celebrating, Cena attacks him outside of the ring and hits him in the head with a monitor. Cena then hits the FU off the steps through a table. That was pretty cool. The rest...not so much. 

Match Rating: *

I get that they were trying to mimic the goofy nature of the classic SNME, but this one just didn't work that great. Everything felt rushed or stale and there wasn't anything you were talking about after the show was over. Even Hogan's return felt uninspired. 

Overall Rating: 40%

SmackDown 7-14-06 Review

Original Airdate: Friday, July 14th, 2006
Target Center
Minneapolis, Minnesota

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King Booker is in the ring and accompanied by Queen Sharmell, William Regal and pyro. They talk about Booker being the new #1 contender and then give us exclusive video from last week of him attacking Rey Mysterio. They are trying to build a main event promo in a very short amount of time here. Out comes Mysterio and attacks Booker, showing a little bit more fire than normal. 

Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy

Hardy attacks Kennedy during his intro and has Kennedy reeling. Kennedy gets some offense in and goes up top. Hardy easily gets there and hits a second rope superplex. Hardy hits the Side Effect, but Kennedy kicks out at 2. He goes for the Twist Of Fate, but Kennedy counters and hits a reverse neckbreaker for a nearfall. The crowd is pretty into this one, which is good to see. Kennedy goes for a Twist Of Fate, but Hardy counters that and hits 10 fists in the corner. Kennedy holds onto the top rope with this Twist Of Fate attempt and Hardy gets his foot on the bottom rope for the pin attempt. Kennedy moves him to the middle of the ring and Hardy rolls him over and steals a victory. This was the first pinfall loss for Kennedy since his debute in 2005. I really enjoyed this match. Both men brought a lot of energy to the match and the crowd was digging it. This has been a strong start to the show tonight. 

Match Rating: ***

Michelle McCool and Kristal are talking trash about Ashley. Ashley and Jillian walk in and we have ourselves a brawl. 

Great Khali and Daivari are out and call out Undertaker. The lights go out, the bell rings and Undertaker is in the ring. We gets some "lightning" and Khali tries to go towards the ring. They pull off and head to the back. 

Paul London vs. Jamie Noble

London gets distracted by Kid Kash and Noble attacks him. Noble dominates until London lands on his feet from a back body drop and hits some clotheslines. He hits a springboard dropkick to the back and gets a 2 count. Kash is able to snap London's neck on the top rope and Noble is able to steal the victory. This was pretty short, but not bad overall. 

Match Rating: *3/4

Miz is backstage with the Diva Search contestants. 

We get Sylvan again. Quebec is #1. 

Teddy Long is in the ring for the contract signing between Mark Henry and Batista. Long says that if either man lays a hand on the other, they will forfeit their opportunity to be the #1 contender. He brings out Batista first and he wants to talk about how Mark Henry ruined the best year of his life. Long now brings out Henry. The contract gets signed and no physicality ensues. 

United States Championship Match
Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley hits a vertical suplex and we already are going into commercial break. During the break, Lashley was thrown into the steel steps and is now in control. Lashley starts to make a comeback, but Finlay grabs a chair. Finlay misses with the chair and Lashley throws him back in the ring. Lashley grabs one of the chairs, which distracts the referee. Hornswoggle comes out and hands Finlay the shillelagh and hits Lashley with it behind the referee's back. Finlay gets the pinfall victory and we have a new United States Champion. That was really short for a match with a title switch. 

Match Rating: **

They show Vito at the Mall Of America. 

Out comes the Miz for the Diva Search bootcamp. They bring out Sgt. Slaughter to run the event. Layla dominates and it's pretty easy to see she was the most athletic of the bunch. Otherwise, this was 8 minutes of my life I will never get back. 

William Regal vs. Rey Mysterio

King Booker is at ringside to join the announce team. When we come back from commercial, we see Booker get knocked off the apron by Mysterio and Regal attack him from behind. Mysterio goes for a headscissor, but Regal tosses him to the mat. Regal looks great here and it's nice that he's gotten an elevated role with the whole King Booker angle. Meanwhile, Michael Cole and Booker are arguing this entire match. Mysterio is able to hit a monkey flip to slow down Regal. Regal tries to throw him out of the ring, but Mysterio holds on and hits the seated senton. Booker distracts the ref and Mysterio hits a sliding dropkick below the belt and follows it up with a Bronco Buster and a split legged moonsault. Mysterio knocks Booker off the apron again and the 619 on Regal. He hits the springboard splash and gets the victory. This was honestly the strongest I can remember them making Mysterio look in a long time. I would have liked if they would have given this a few more minutes, as both guys looked really good here. After the match, Mysterio hits a 619 around the ring post on Booker. 

Match Rating: **3/4

After all of the crap they have been giving us on Raw, this was a breath of fresh air. It still had some garbage on it, but the good stuff here was a lot of fun. I will gladly take episodes like this every week.

Overall Rating: 64%

ECW 7-11-06 Review

Tuesday, July 11th, 2006
Target Center
Minneapolis, Minnesota

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After a lengthy recap of Big Show winning the ECW Championship, Paul Heyman is out with a riot squad. He blames the fans for RVD losing the title. He talks about doing what's best for ECW and they then show him walking to the back. Tommy Dreamer confronts him and is wondering what Heyman is thinking. Heyman says that there is no time to explain because Dreamer's match is next. Dreamer is in street clothes and wasn't aware he had a match here.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Test

So Dreamer has to wrestle in street clothes here and then clotheslines Test over the top rope. Test immediately drives Dreamer into the ring post and throws him back in the ring. This seemed like a perfect opportunity for Test to evolve as a performer after being away for a couple of years, but instead he's pretty much the same. Dreamer makes a comeback with a swinging neckbreaker and a reverse neckbreaker. Dreamer goes for the DDT, but Test counters and hits a full nelson slam. Test goes up to the top rope, but misses with the elbow drop. Dreamer goes for the Dreamer Driver, but Test counters, rolls him up and puts his feet on the ropes for the victory. I'm not sure that really did much for Test here. 

Match Rating: 3/4*

Candice is getting dressed backstage and then gets up close with Kelly to tell her that she's going to make this extreme. 

Ariel the tarot card reader says that the future holds blood and then Kevin Thorn comes in and spits out blood at the camera. 

Now it's time for Kelly's Exposé and it ends how it always ends, with Mike Knox taking Kelly away. Only this time, Sandman comes out and attacks Knox. Sandman hits him in the head and he falls off the stage and crushes a can of beer in celebration.

CM Punk talks about his tattoos.

Sabu vs. Justin Credible

Credible attacks Sabu right away, but Sabu is quickly on offense. Credible goes looking under the ring, but Sabu does a somersault dive over the top rope. He hits another somersault over the top back into the ring. Sabu sets up the table that Credible pulled from under the ring. For some reason, it looks like the crappiest table they could have found. Sabu lays Credible on the table and hits a leg drop through the table. Since this wasn't an Extreme Rules match, Sabu is disqualified. Cool. Don't worry though. It will be Extreme Rules at Saturday Night's Main Event.

Match Rating: 1/4*

We hear from Balls Mahoney and he's balls to the wall. Yep. 

Now Ric Flair tells us who he is and he's going to win his 17th world title tonight. 

Shannon Moore is coming and now he looks like a punk. 

Extreme Rules For The ECW Championship
Ric Flair vs. Big Show

We get some stalling into the commercial break, but when we come back the match if already in progress. Flair gets busted open pretty early on and Big Show dominates. Flair is able to get in a couple of low blows to finally slow down the champ. Flair pulls out a barbed wire baseball bat and starts wailing on Show. It is pretty crazy looking at it over 15 years later that Ric Flair and Big Show had the crowd chanting "E-C-W" in a match under the ECW brand owned by WWE. Flair pours out some tacks and starts hitting Show in the head with a chair until he falls in the tacks. Show isn't happy about it, so he gets up and chokeslams Flair and then puts on his new finisher for the submission victory. He then throws Flair stomach first into the tacks for good measure. I hate to see guys like this take some of these risks, but as a novelty match, they did make it entertaining. 

Match Rating: ***

Flair gets walked to the back by the medical staff as we go off the air.

Pretty much everything on this show outside of the main event wasn't good. It's only an hour, which will always work in its favor, but this one wasn't particularly worth your time. 

Overall Rating: 45%

Monday Night Raw 7-10-06 Review

Monday, July 10th, 2006
Tyson Events Center
Sioux City, Iowa

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After a recap of Edge winning the WWE Championship, Edge and Lita are here to join the announce team. 

John Cena vs. Shelton Benjamin

Edge will be taking on John Cena at Saturday Night's Main Event this weekend. Cena goes for the FU early, but Shelton gets out and slaps Cena in the face. After a boot to the face, Shelton gets aggressive with some right hands. Shelton locks in the sleeper hold and after a lengthy amount of time in the hold, Cena is able to hit the electric chair. Cena climbs up top, but up leaps Shelton and he hits him with an enzuigiri that knocks Cena to the floor. After the commercial break, Cena gets into a slugfest that he gets the better of and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Shelton misses a splash in the corner, Cena hits the FU and slaps on the STFU for the victory. The commercial break kind of messed with the momentum, but this was more competitive than expected. After the match, Cena attacks Edge by leaping over the announce table. He throws him in the ring, but Lita holds onto his leg and Edge goes on offense. Edge hits the Spear and heads to the back. Edge says that they are going back to the hotel to watch the rest of the show. 

Match Rating: **1/4

Oh great, a recap of DX and Vince from last week.

Eugene is backstage laughing and then Vince and Shane walk up behind him. They tell him that he is facing them in a handicap match to teach DX a lesson.

Melina vs. Trish Stratus

Nitro distracts Trish and Melina attacks her outside the ring. Back in the ring, Melina hits a dropkick to the back for a 2 count. Trish hits the handstand hurricanrana in the corner and hits some chops. Trish hits a spinebuster and almost gets the win. Melina then out of nowhere rolls her up, grabs the tights and steals the victory. This was too short to be anything memorable. 

Match Rating: 3/4*

We go to Edge and Lita checking in at the hotel. Their room isn't ready yet, so Edge mocks them with a hillbilly accent. 

Highlanders vs. Matt Striker & Rob Conway

The Highlanders are talking about corn and get interrupted by Striker's music. The Highlanders hit their "comedy" offense and get another easy victory. Nothing to see here. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Ric Flair is with Maria and he says that tonight is all business. He is going to tell the world the truth about Mick Foley. After the commercial break, Flair is out to the ring. Foley interrupts him on the Titan Tron. Foley talks about Flair not writing his own book like he did and how Flair was the boss when he lost his ear in a match. He goes on a passionate tirade about how Flair doesn't matter to him any more. Flair tells him to come out here now, but instead Paul Heyman comes out. He shows Flair the clip of Big Show winning the ECW Championship and then brings him out. Show rambles on forever and then finally challenges Flair to an ECW Championship match tomorrow night. Flair accepts and then gets distracted by Heyman, which allows Show to attack him. 

Back to the McMahons and then Eugene knocks on the door and apologizes. They give him a present and it's a DX shirt. While he's talking about how much he likes it, they dump green paint on him and then attack him. Shane then gives him a swirly in the toilet. 

They show Paul Heyman talking with Candice Michelle during the break and he invites her to dance against Kelly. She says she'd rather dance with Kelly.

Viscera vs. Charlie Haas

Haas doesn't even get an entrance here. I can't believe this story is still going on. Haas is able to slow down the big man by snapping his neck on the top rope. He hits a missile dropkick, but Vis fights back and gyrates in the direction of Lillian Garcia. He misses Haas in the corner, but then Garcia gets on the mic and pleads for them to both stop. She only wants to be friends with both of them. Haas attacks Vis in the eyes, but then Garcia gets in the way of him off the ropes. Vis, who is apparently blinded, hits the Samoan drop accidentally on Garcia. They both check on her and then look at each other and laugh. Thrilling television here. Meanwhile, we get a stretcher job. This match was nothing. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Edge and Lita are shown in the bar at the hotel. 

The Miz is out for the Diva Search and he screws up massively here with how to vote. Ironically, the first woman to walk out is none other than future wife Maryse. All of the women get a chance to tell everyone why they're going to win. Maryse gets booed when she screws up as well. Miz announces that they will be doing it on SmackDown and then Miz screws up voting again. 

Shane tells Coach to let him know as soon as DX shows up. In walks Jim Duggan to confront him and he tells him that he'll beat some respect into him. Vince hits him in the back with a chair and they mock him as he is laid out. 

Randy Orton vs. Val Venis

They're in rush mode now, as Orton is already almost to the ring when we come back from commercial. He has a mic and talks about Hulk Hogan being at Saturday Night's Main Event. He says that he plans on introducing himself to Hogan. Orton hits the RKO and gets the win. He grabs the mic again and says that he also plans on introducing himself to Brooke Hogan too. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Back to Edge and Lita, this time in their room. They get their room service delivered and they then demand that the staff member bring them champagne since this is a celebration.

After they run through the SNME card, they show Cena busting in their hotel room and attacking Edge. 

This new voice announcing the matches coming up next is just weird. 

Handicap Match
Shane & Vince McMahon vs. Eugene

As Eugene is coming out, the Spirit Squad come out. The distraction allows Shane to attack him and we're underway. Vince is doing live commentary during the match. The Spirit Squad puts Eugene on a table and Shane is up top. Out comes DX to interrupt. Vince tries to get them to get them to go in a certain spot, but those clever DX boys are just too smart for that. The net drops and misses. Eugene comes in from behind and rolls up Vince for the victory. Half of the match was DX walking around the stage. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

On the bright side, this was an improvement over last week. Unfortunately, just about everything would have been. There definitely was some good here. The Cena/Shelton match was solid and the Foley portion of the Flair segment was entertaining. Everything else was pretty much useless.

Overall Rating: 42%

NXT 7-17-14 Review

Original Airdate: Thursday, July 17th, 2014
Full Sail University
Winter Park, Florida

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Enzo Amore & Big Cass vs. Vaudevillains

This is the first time in a long time that Enzo and Cass have teamed up due to Enzo's injury. Aiden English works on the arm of Enzo to start. Enzo is able to fight out and make a tag to Cass and he overpowers English. In comes Gotch and he suffers the same fate. Cass does the S-A-W-F-T chant, but then out comes Sylvester Lefort and it distracts Cass, allowing Gotch to roll him up and get the victory. They weren't having a good match, but they also never really got a chance to get going. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

The Ascension cut a promo about no one being able to stop them or something.

They show a recap of the Charlotte/Summer Rae storyline.

CJ Parker vs. Xavier Woods

Woods hits a dropkick early on and tries to work on the arm. Woods ducks some clotheslines and hits a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. Parker throws Woods to the ground and Woods hits the bottom rope with his throat. Parker hits a clothesline and follows up with some left hands. Woods is able to make a comeback and hits a kick from the apron. He hits a DDT, but Parker kicks out at 2. Woods misses a crossbody off the top rope, Parker misses a heel kick, but Parker is able to roll up Woods. He was supposed to grab the ropes, but he was too far away, so he gets the clean victory. They packed a lot of match into a couple of minutes, but why not just have them wrestle a few minutes longer?

Match Rating: *3/4

Sami Zayn is backstage for an interview to talk about Tyson Kidd. He says that he's going to embarrass him tonight.

Alexa Bliss vs. Sasha Banks

We're only 23 minutes into the show and we're on our third match. Bliss hits a sunset flip for a 2 count, but then gets hit with a knee to the midsection immediately after. Sasha hits the double knees to the midsection while Bliss is on the ropes. Bliss goes for a somersault off the top rope, but rolls through when Sasha moves out of the way. This leads to Sasha putting on the Bank Statement and a victory. Again, this was too short, which tends to be a theme here on NXT.

Match Rating: *1/4

Tyler Breeze says that he isn't going to rush to face Adrian Neville for the NXT Championship. He says that his agent is working on the contract for the match and says that instead we will see his award winning music video again. 

They show highlights of how Kidd won his match last night. They try to talk to Natalya, but she doesn't want to talk about. They go to Tyson Kidd and he doesn't want to talk about his wife. He said accidents happen, but when he beats Sami tonight, it won't be an accident.

Adam Rose vs. Jason Jordan

This is Rose's first match in NXT since TakeOver. Jason Jordan gets an entrance and a bubble promo saying that his partner Tye Dillinger is hurt, but also was last seen with the Rosebuds. Jordan gets a little bit of offense in after Rose goofs around a bit. Rose hits a leaping 2nd rope hurricanrana, which I don't remember ever seeing him hit before. He hits the Party Foul and that's all. This one got about as much time as the last couple matches, but didn't do as much with it. 

Match Rating: 3/4*

Kalisto gets a rare backstage interview, but quickly gets interrupted by the Vaudevillains. He said his partner El Local and him have parted ways. Kalisto says he'll find a new partner to face the Vaudevillains next week.

Tyson Kidd vs. Sami Zayn

After some stalling, Kidd dominates the match after a suplex on the entrance ramp. Kidd puts Sami in the tree of woe and hits the running dropkick. Zayn is able to knock Kidd out of the ring and hits a springboard moonsault on Kidd on the floor. Back in the ring, Zayn goes up top and hits a crossbody for a 2 count. Kidd hits a drop toe hold into the bottom turnbuckle and hits a leg drop for another 2 count. Kidd goes for the top rope elbow drop, but Sami gets the knees up. He hits the Blue Thunder Bomb and Kidd kicks out. Kidd hits a top rope Blockbuster and this time Sami kicks out. Kidd puts on the Sharpshooter in the center of the ring. Sami gets close to the bottom rope, but Kidd pulls him back to the center. Sami is able to once again crawl and this time reaches the rope. Kidd goes up top, Sami catches him and puts him in the Koji Clutch for the victory. This was a good match between the two and I'm actually a little surprised that Sami won here. 

Match Rating: ***1/4

This was a pretty entertaining episode that tried to cram in more than it had time for. They could have easily just saved one of the other matches for next week and gave more time to either the Sasha or Parker matches. With that being said, NXT continues to deliver consistently solid episodes here in 2014. 

Overall Rating: 60%

Monday Night Raw 7-25-94 Review

Original Airdate: Monday, July 25th, 1994
Fernwood Resort
Bushkill, Pennsylvania

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Guess what? Another Ted DiBiase recap.

$10,000 Challenge Match
Nikolai Volkoff vs. Tatanka

I can't believe Volkoff is still a thing. Volkoff hits approximately 100 kicks in the early going. Tatanka tries to make a comeback, but he gets hit with a reverse elbow. He ducks a clothesline though and hits one of his own and then a dropkick to send Volkoff over the top rope. Back in the ring and Volkoff is kicking again. Tatanka comes back again with some chops and gets a 2 count after a top rope chop. Tatanka gets a small package and gets the victory to put us out of our misery here. Randy Savage quickly comes into the ring to rub it in DiBiase's face that he's losing $10,000. DiBiase says that Tatanka could never beat his Lex Luger, but Tatanka says he could on his worst day. Out comes Luger and they challenge each other to a match. If you like chops and kicks, this one was for you.

Match Rating: 1/2*

Headshrinkers vs. Joey Stallings & Barry Hardy

Samu hits a second rope DDT and then hit a double clothesline. They hit the double Skull Crushing Finale and then the top rope splash for the easy victory. They seemed a little unmotivated here.

Match Rating: 1/4*

Next week it's Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon in a big time match.

Jim Neidhart vs. Jim Powers

Powers is still a jobber despite looking light years better than all of the other ones we usually see. Neidhart sends him flying over the top rope. Powers gets no offense in here for whatever reason and Neidhart puts on the Camel Clutch for the victory.

Match Rating: 1/4*

Jim Ross brings out Alundra Blayze. Remember her? She talks about Luna and Bull Nakano, the latter of which she will be wrestling last week. Out comes Luna and she claims that she's the one who brought Bull to the US and then leaves. Just in case you didn't know, Alundra is a member of the New Generation.

Yokozuna vs. Adam Bomb

Bomb tries a series of clotheslines and then a shoulder tackle to knock Yokozuna out of the ring and we go to a commercial break. Yoko quickly recovers and slows things down. Bomb is able to avoid a splash in the corner. He follows that up with some clotheslines and a DDT. Bomb hits a second rope clothesline and out comes Harvey Wippelman and Kwang. Kwang trips up Bomb's feet behind the ref's back. Bomb goes out of the ring and starts dominating Kwang. Bomb is counted out and Yoko just watches as Bomb throws Wippleman onto Kwang. This was better than most would probably anticipate. 

Match Rating: *

Duke Droese vs. Duane Gill

Droese dominates, as he should. Lawler calls in and rambles on while Droese hits his finisher and I actually dozed off during this match. This was nothing. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Well, next week's show is stacked, but what about this week? This week was filled with mostly things that don't matter, unless you were for some reason hooked on the Million Dollar Corporation. We are starting to trend into one of the WWE's worst stretches and it's starting to show the signs. 

Overall Rating: 43%

Superstars 7-23-94 Review

Original Airdate: Saturday, July 23rd, 1994
Ocean City Convention Center
Ocean City, Maryland

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Shawn Michaels tells us that he's going to break some big Ted DiBiase news on the Heartbreak Hotel today. Lawler claims that Luger has officially signed with DiBiase.

Jeff Jarrett vs. 1-2-3 Kid

This is a Superstars match that I can get behind. Neither star really takes control of the match until Jarrett gains control into the commercial break. Kid makes a comeback in front of the always raucous Ocean City crowd. The building doesn't look bad when they are on the standard shot, but the ceiling and walls make it feel like they are at a giant bingo hall. The action spills outside and Kid hits a series of kicks. Kid goes for a clothesline, but Jarrett ducks and Kid hits the post. Both men are counted out and that's about as disappointing as it gets. At least let them go at it for a few more minutes. After the match, Jarrett attacks Kid from behind and hits a good looking piledriver followed by a not as good looking piledriver. Jarrett then calls him yellow and gets cut off to go to the Live Event update. 

Match Rating: **

They show the history of Owen and Bret. 

Jim Neidhart vs. Rich Myers

Neidhart was already 39 years old here in '94, which is pretty close to how old Natalya is in 2022. Neidhart obviously dominates here and gets the easy victory. After the match, he puts Myers in the Camel Clutch and they put Bret's glasses on him. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

We get a pretty hilarious video of Bob Backlund working out. He's ready for Bret Hart next week and will be the next WWF Champion. 

We get Leslie Nielsen dressed up as Undertaker as this whole thing begins. 

Tatanka vs. Austin Steele

Tatanka's heel turn sure seems obvious here. I guess it may not have had I been watching when I was 11, but he is already wrestling more heelish. Steele gets in a reverse elbow, who looks like a dime store version of Ric Flair. Tatanka hits the Samoan Drop for the victory. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

We get an Italian restaurtant/mafia commercial for the New Generation. 

It's time for the Heartbreak Hotel. DiBiase talks about backing up his promises and then calls out Lex Luger. Luger eventually comes out and so does Tatanka. Tatanka calls him a sell out, but Luger says that there is no deal. Luger says there isn't enough money to sell out his integrity and he believes in the same things that Tatanka does. Luger walks off and Tatanka says that he can only believe what he saw and he doesn't believe Luger. DiBiase still claims Luger is in the Corporation. 

It's time for a SummerSlam Report. Todd Pettengill announces that Diesel will defend his Intercontinental Championship against Razor Ramon. We get an interview from Razor and he says he takes a chance every chance he gets. We get another Paul Bearer promo and he talks about studying the fake Undertaker. Bret then says that he never dreamed that this whole saga with Owen would get this out of hand. 

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Tyrone Knox

Bam Bam dominates Knox and hits a vertical suplex. He pulls up Knox on the 2 count to continue the punishment. Bam Bam puts on the Million Dollar Dream and hits a bulldog out of it for the victory. I like the old Bam Bam better. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

They show DiBiase buying out Johnny Polo's spot on All-American Wrestling. I'm not really sure why they thought it was a great idea to build their whole promotion around a managing DiBiase. They hype up Backlund vs. Bret next week and that's all. 

This was just about everything bad about 1994 in a 45 minute show. I have been on a real cold streak here lately on the blog. This was hardly the worst of the worst, but it was pretty boring. I would have just been happier if they would have let Kid and Jarrett just have a 15 minute match.

Overall Rating: 40%

SmackDown 7-7-06 Review

Original Airdate: Friday, July 7th, 2006
Wachovia Center
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

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World Heavyweight Championship #1 Contender Battle Royal

Notable contestants here include Finlay, Matt Hardy, King Booker and Mr. Kennedy. Super Crazy and Psicosis are eliminated first and then start brawling outside the ring. The jobbers start to get eliminated to clear out the ring. Finlay throws Kennedy to London, Kendrick and Hardy and they are able to eliminate him. We're down to the aforementioned three and Finlay, William Regal and Booker. So much for suspense here. London goes for a springboard move after almost being eliminated and eats a forearm that knocks him to the floor. Kendrick is eliminated quickly after. Hardy is able to dump Finlay out, but Booker quickly attacks him. Hardy hits a Side Effect on Booker and he then tries to dump him out. Regal makes the save but then gets hit with a flying forearm. Hardy hits the bulldog on Booker, but gets hit with a sucker punch by Booker. Hardy is able to hit a double clothesline, but still can't eliminate Booker. Regal again saves him. Regal and Hardy are battling on the ropes and Booker eliminates both to become the #1 contender. This was every battle royal you've ever seen. Regal then reminds us to "All hail, King Booker". 

Match Rating: *

Rey Mysterio says that Mark Henry disrespected his friend, Chavo Guerrero and the Guerrero name. They show the attack of Henry and Mysterio apologizes for not being able to help Chavo out. He shifts over to his match with Booker and tells him that he's just one move away from a 619.

Sylvan is here to try to talk people into spending their summer in Quebec. We then go to Miz in the crowd to tell us Batista is here. 

Mr. Kennedy vs. Super Crazy

Super Crazy interrupts Kennedy's ring introduction and Kennedy makes him pay for it. Crazy tries to get something going, but Kennedy hits him with a rear elbow and takes him to the mat. Super Crazy makes another comeback attempt, but Psicosis comes out and throws his sunglasses at him and Kennedy takes him off the top rope. He hits the Kenton Bomb for the victory. This was more dull than you would expect from these two. After the match, Kennedy gets his mic time. 

Match Rating: *3/4

Kristal is supposed to be with Tatanka, but she's complaining about Ashley instead. She realizes the camera is rolling and goes to interview Tatanka. Tatanka says he will take down the Great Khali tonight. I'm sure he will. 

Daivari is backstage with a casket before the commercial break. 

They show clips of the WWE in the Caribbean and Central America. 

Daivari is in the ring with the casket at ringside and brings out Khali. Daivari talks about the first ever Punjabi Prison Match at Great American Bash. Tatanka comes out and he attacks him on the way in the ring. I guess this isn't a match because he hits a double handed chokeslam and they play his music. He goes to put Tatanka in the casket and smoke comes out of it. Undertaker comes on the speaker and tells him he will rest in peace. I didn't care in 2006 and I certainly don't care now. 

Vito vs. Psicosis

I'm surprised this wasn't saved for WrestleMania. We get shenanigans to start off, until Psicosis makes Vito mad. Vito does the Macarena, but gets hit by a boot and a clothesline. This match goes on for way too long until Super Crazy predictably comes out to distract Psicosis. Vito puts on his submission hold and that's all. This was pretty terrible.

Match Rating: 1/4*

Pitbulls vs. Funaki & Scotty 2 Hotty

Kid Kash's trunks here are really ugly. The Pitbulls show off their physicality, but Scotty gets a hot tag and gets in a little bit of offense. It doesn't last long and the Pitbulls hit a clothesline/spear combination for the quick victory. JBL tries his best to make it seem impressive that they beat two former champions. The Pitbulls did look good though. 

Match Rating: *

They run down the Great American Bash card so far and announce that Lashley will defend his United States Championship against William Regal and Finlay. They then go back to Finlay telling Regal that it's every man for himself and Hornswoggle starts humping Regal's leg.

Gregory Helms vs. Bobby Lashley

They hype up the length of Helms' title reign. Meanwhile, Lashley does the British Bulldog vertical suplex. Lashley hits the gorilla press into a powerslam and that is all. That sure made Helms look like a nobody, so congrats on that. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

They interview Mark Henry backstage and that he's sick and tired of Batista. He says that if Batista calls him out, he will have the shortest comeback in history. 

We go to Miz in the crowd and yells that he has confirmation that Batista is out next. 

Batista comes out to a big pop and calls out Henry right away. Henry comes out and before he gets into the ring, he says he's going to go back, but out comes Rey Mysterio from behind. Henry chucks him out of the way, but Batista throws him into the steps. He picks up the steps and nails him in the face and Henry is bleeding. I'm not sure if I can remember another time that Henry bled. Batista grabs a chair and hits him multiple times in the back. Batista stands tall as they go off the air.

Well, I'm not sure how they did it, but they did it. They delivered three really bad shows in one arena. I know it's a holiday week and all, but this was just not a good show. The saddest part of it all is that it was better than both Raw and ECW. Other than Batista coming back, there was nothing on this show worth watching.

Overall Rating: 39%

ECW 7-4-06 Review

Tuesday, July 4th, 2006
Wachovia Center
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

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Paul Heyman is backstage to tell us that Rob Van Dam did lose the WWE Championship, but he is still the ECW Champion. In walks Big Show and he says that he was told if he jumps to ECW, he would get a title shot. Heyman tries to talk him out of it for the time being, but Big Show wants it tonight.

Kelly Kelly is back and dressed in red, white and blue and it's the same old story here. Mike Knox comes out, comes out and brings her to the back.

Mike Knox vs. Little Guido

Knox grabs the mic and says that Kelly is his girlfriend. Guido tries to attack him, but it doesn't work. I really can't believe they did an exclusive ECW show on the 4th of July in Philadelphia and this was the show that they delivered for them. Knox is getting all sorts of chants at him and then misses with a knee drop. Guido attacks the knee, but eats a bicycle kick to the face. He then hits the Knox Out and gets the victory. Just a squash.

Match Rating: 1/4*

RVD is backstage and says to give Show the match tonight. He doesn't want this to be a place where the big guys get to do whatever they want. Heyman doesn't want to, but RVD says if Heyman doesn't, he will.

Some guy dressed up like a priest (but looks nothing like a priest) grabs the mic and insults the crowd for paying for this. He probably has a point this week. He then says he isn't a priest, he just did it so that he could get that off his chest. He then goes back to his seat in the first row. Sandman's music hits and he comes into the ring. He stalls forever before attacking the guy. 

RVD walks into Show's locker room and accepts the challenge.

RVD then talks to Paul and the match is on. It will be Extreme Rules. 

Test vs. Al Snow

Get excited, Test is back. Test attacks Snow, while the crowd tells him that he can't wrestle. He hits the TKO and that's it. After the match, he takes Snow's head and kicks it into the crowd.

Match Rating: 1/4*

The eventual Kevin Thorne is once again outside the arena.

CM Punk then gives a backstage promo about his straight edge ways. 

Extreme Rules Match For The ECW Championship
Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

They quickly start brawling and are into the front row. RVD is able to step up on the barricade and kick Show in the head. He then hits a guillotine leg drop from the apron before the commercial break. Back in the ring, Show hits a superplex from the second rope. Show slows things down with some rest holds. He goes for a chokeslam, but RVD counters it with a DDT. RVD hits Rolling Thunder, but Show easily kicks out of the pin attempt. Show tosses him out of the ring, but when he goes to attack RVD with steps, he trips him up and lands in the steps. RVD goes off the top rope, but Show catches him and rams him into the ring. RVD grabs a chair, but Show swats it down and hits the Chokeslam. RVD kicks out, so Show takes the referee and tosses him out of the ring. Show goes for a powerbomb, but RVD grabs the chair on the way up and hits him in the head. RVD hits the Five Star Frog Splash, but there's no ref. Out comes Heyman and he counts to 2, but then stops counting. Heyman walks out of the ring, but continues to distract RVD. Show hits RVD with a chair to the head and then a Chokeslam on the chair for the victory. Philadelphia really has seen some of the worst booking decisions in WWE history. THe crowd starts throwing trash in the ring as Show and Heyman celebrate. The match was pretty good, but it pretty much instantly killed the brand in the eyes of ECW loyalists. 

Match Rating: **1/2

After the turd of a show they delivered on Raw in this same arena, they come in and delivered another one 24 hours later. Not the best week in WWE.

Overall Rating: 38%

Monday Night Raw 7-3-06 Review

Monday, July 3rd, 2006
Wachovia Center
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Follow me on Twitter: @WorkTheNetwork2

After a very lengthy recap of last weeks DX segment, we see Triple H and Shawn Michaels are greeted by a wall of security and Jonathan Coachman. He informs them that they are barred from the building. DX leaves with Triple H smiling creepily. 

Edge and Lita are here to talk about RVD and John Cena. He compares himself to Terrell Owens and how badly he wants to get out of Philly. He's about to tell us who his partner tonight will be in the tag team match tonight, but out comes Cena. They start brawling and Cena kicks Edge out of the ring. RVD's music hits and asks Cena if he wants another title shot, let's do it tonight. Edge isn't digging it because if Cena wins, his title shot on ECW tomorrow isn't going to happen. RVD says that we all know that he's going to interfere anyways, so he proposes that they do the Saturday Night's Main Event match tonight. We're getting a triple threat here tonight. For those that don't remember, this was right after RVD and Sabu were pulled over with marijuana, so we got all sorts of changes here on the fly. 

They show Vince showing up in a limo and greeted by Coach. Vince only wants to know that DX is not here. Coach informs him that they were here, but that he told them that he informed them that they were barred from the arena. In the background there is a convertible with women screaming pulling up. 

Lita vs. Torrie Wilson

I can't remember the last time that Lita had a singles match on TV. Lita hits a suplex and a side Russian leg sweep. Torrie fights back with some clotheslines and a dropkick. She goes for the stinkface, but the referee gets it instead. Lita hits a DDT and that's all. Lita looked a little sluggish here, as she tries to get comfortable working as a heel. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Vince is yelling at Coach about lack of staffing and Coach said a lot of people took off for the holiday weekend. Vince has never taken a day off in his life and isn't buying it.

Spirit Squad vs. Eugene, Jim Duggan, Val Venis, Viscera, Snitsky

Well, this is a match that happened. The Spirit Squad singles out Venis in their corner to start. JR talks about this arena being the last televised appearance of Gorilla Monsoon, which I greatly appreciate. Meanwhile, the Squad is now dominating Eugene. Eugene makes a tag to Snitsky and he starts steamrolling Kenny and Nicky. He gets distracted, but hits a sidewalk slam on Kenny for a 2 count. Things start to break down and they dump out most of their opponents. They hit a double suplex on Snitsky and then Kenny and Mikey hits a leg drop/senton combo and get the victory. This was a pretty dominating victory for the Spirit Squad, which was fairly rare. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

We get DX on the Titan Tron and they are having a party out in the parking lot. One of the bus drivers comes up for some food and Triple H has two girls flash him. 

Matt Striker & Rob Conway vs. Highlanders

This is the debut of the Highlanders. Conway and Striker are getting the rare TV match here. They hit lots of headbutts, punches and kicks. How dare I forget the skirt humor. Conway hits a back suplex and tries to tag in Striker, but he refuses. He says that he's too smart to tag in. Rory hits a back body drop and they hit the Scot Drop for the victory. The Bushwhackers 2000 are just so unorthodox. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Candice Michelle comes up to Triple H. This leads to some terrible sexual humor. 

They then go in the TV truck, which is cooler just because we hardly ever got to see this. Shawn then pushes a button he was told not to push. It messes up the screen. Hilarious. 

Vince has to go to the bathroom and asks Coach to guard it. Shawn and Triple H are in the truck and go to the bathroom cam. Vince is peeing and in walks Coach and Vince turns to him and pees on him. Coach informs him that he's on TV right now. He storms away mad. Hilarious.

Vince is in the ring when we come back from break. Vince's microphone keeps cutting out, so he grabs a new one and that one has feedback. His mic then gives him a chipmunk voice. I can't believe I'm able to type since I am laughing so hard. Oh wait, I forgot the fart sounds. Triple H then shows clips of him from last week. Coach tries to get into the truck, but Shawn knocks him off the steps when he opens the door. Vince then announces that DX is facing the Spirit Squad (again) in an elimination match. They play the "Stand Back" video again and Vince storms away. This was a death segment. 

Intercontinental Championship Match
Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito

Nitro fakes getting a thumb to the eye and uses the distraction to attack Carlito. Carlito comes back with a hurricanrana, but that's about all he gets in. Nitro gets in a little bit of offense, but Carlito makes a quick comeback. Melina distracts Carlito, but it backfires and he hits a Backstabber on Nitro. Melina breaks up the count and gets disqualified. Out comes Trish Stratus to wake up the crowd and they start brawling. Trish knocks her off the apron and then DX replays Trish running down to the ring over and over. This match was nothing. 

Match Rating: 1/2*

RVD is back with Paul Heyman and Heyman is telling him that the odds are against them tonight. RVD believes in himself and ECW. Apparently he didn't believe in the law though. 

We get to meet the Diva Search contestants including Maryse and Layla. 

Vince wants to leave. So do I. 

Umaga vs. Scott Wright

DX interrupts Armando Alejandro Estrada's speech with a shirt ad. Umaga has his usual squash match and they really need to find him a story he can get people invested in. Armando tries to talk again and gets interrupted by belching sounds. 

Match Rating: 1/4*

Vince is shown getting into his limo and a bunch of fireworks go off in the limo and then a green smoke comes out. Vince comes out covered in black and coughing. DX walks up and says that it's too bad they were barred from the building. 

Batista is back Friday. 

Out comes Randy Orton and as if this episode isn't bad enough, he brings up going on a date with Brooke Hogan. 

Triple Threat Match For The WWE Championship 
Edge vs. John Cena vs. Rob Van Dam

I promise you they could have just had this match go on 20 minutes longer than it's going to get here and people would have been a lot happier than they were with the crap we got here. RVD and Cena take turns beating up Edge and then throw him out of the ring into the commercial break. Edge sneaks in and tries to pin RVD, but has his feet on the ropes. Unfortunately for Edge, this makes no sense because there are no disqualifications in this match, so it should have counted. Cena has Edge up for a suplex and RVD comes off the top rope with a crossbody. That looked like that probably hurt RVD the most. Edge and Cena then slam down RVD and then Edge and Cena hit a double clothesline. Cena hits a Five Knuckle Shuffle on Edge and then FU's him over the top rope. He hits the FU on Lita, but then eats a chair to the face from a RVD kick. Cena hits the FU on RVD and Edge runs in and nails Cena and pins Cena to once again become the WWE Champion. If I remember right, I believe everyone assumed Cena would win here, but instead they made Edge's career with this decision. Yes, the cash in earlier in the year was the big moment, but this was the one that cemented him as a real player. This was a good match even if it had a few weird psychology screw ups. 

Match Rating: ***1/4

A good main event did not make up for the other 80 minutes of this turd of a show. Absolutely horrific. This is probably the worst Raw to ever have a major title change on it. 

Overall Rating: 30%